Who do you mirror in your daily life?
Let’s face it, we mirror what we were taught in our families growing up. We may try not to be the whoever wounded us, but there are moments that they jump out of our bodies onto another person.
My mother was a master manipulator. Cold shoulder and poignant looks were just two of her tools. Shame was her favorite tool. Her manipulative behaviors combined with some other bullies I had left me many times emotionally unable to handle life.
Were my problems bad? Probably not; however, my truth at the moment was they were life ending. I was made to feel unimportant, worthless, and inferior. These feelings have stayed with me and still effect me to this day. They are what I know and when others cause me to feel this way, I am that teenage standing in front of the mirror telling herself she has no place here.
I recently invented a new image that I hope to cling to when I start feeling this way. I imagine Christ standing in the mirror countering all those negative things I say with His loving truths. All those hurtful words spoken to me over a lifetime have a scripture telling me the opposite (ie, unwanted-Galatians 1:15 “But when He who had set me apart before I was born, and who called me by His grace”).
I realized as I was writing this that I have not even mirrored Christ to myself. I wish I could go back and ask each of those persons who inflicted their ugly words upon me if they were mirroring Christ at that moment. In my Mother’s case, I had a fear factor involved, fear of my Father. This question of mirroring can be applied to conversations we have with others too. We all have stories to tell, but is that story you are sharing yours to share? Is it mirroring Christ?
A counselor recently used a phrase in a session that might also apply to conversations (out loud or in our heads), “Let them have their truth.” I wanted to adjust their truth. Keeping quiet is hard (especially for me). Maybe the truth you want to adjust is not yours to adjust. Maybe that truth needs to be adjusted by the person who is sitting in that truth. And maybe that truth needs the adjustment provided by scripture.
“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” Psalm 19:14.
Adjusting our wounded thought, our truths, takes time. Mirroring Christ to others, starts at home…in our head and heart, then to our loved ones. How are you mirroring Christ?
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