Today (Saturday) I find myself very disappointed. Omission of facts is the same a lying in my opinion. Finding out that you have been lied to is a disappointment in itself. It breaks down trust between you and that person.
It was a distraction. I am on a Women’s Retreat trying to connect with God. To find Joy in the Journey. Instead I wake up to disappointment. When leads to anger. Then God speaks. Psalm 5:6 “You destroy those who speak lies; the Lord abhors the bloodthirsty & deceitful man.” Ok, so not what I want for this person. But it seems God and I are on the same page. We hate lies.
Psalm 5:11-12 But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing for joy, and spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may exult in you. For you bless the righteous, O LORD, you cover him with favor as with a shield.” Let me just camp out here. These two verses took my anger away. These words calmed me and restored me as soon as I read them. So, now I am filled with a peace.
Finding joy in the journey is tough most of the time. But allowing God to fill us with His peace, brings forth a joy and peace that can only come from Him. I am currently studying Psalm 1-71 in a daily devotional series. Day 3 is Psalm 5. I have found each morning new verses that I have read before but did not retain. Psalm 5 this morning was a call of restoration for me.
See, I have been praying for the women who were coming to the retreat for a month. Notice I said for the women? I failed to include me in those prayers. Others were praying for me, but I failed to include myself. So, this morning waking up to such a distraction should have derailed my whole retreat. Why? Because I normally allow disappointments and anger to dwell; therefore, derailing my purpose for coming on a retreat like this.
Distractions prevent us from connecting with God. My whole purpose for coming on this retreat was to connect with God. My mind this morning was so cluttered with my disappointment that I could not enjoy my quiet time with God. Then God spoke.
Am I disappointed? Yes. Am I angry? No. I am currently singing praises to the God who hates lies and will handle those that lie. Let that be a warning to us all. God hates lies and He will expose those lies. Honesty really is the best policy.
I love it when God reveals Himself in scripture. I love how He knew I needed to hear from Him this morning.
I wrote this over the weekend, but could not connect to the internet until today. I struggle with handling disappointments. Especially when you want to trust that person, but time and time again, you find they are not trustworthy. My call at this point is to avoid trusting and just praying for them. I will mourn the lost of trust, I pray one day it will be restored.